Ava - On The Eve Of Your Second Birthday

I've been writing weekly and monthly updates for the kids for years now, but none have felt as surreal and as bittersweet as this. My baby girl, Ava Jean is two tomorrow. How did that happen?

It's such a cliche when parents say that their children grow up too fast, and I'll admit that I've lost count of the number of times that I've said and typed that exact phrase, but it is so true. Not only does it feel so surreal, but it also feels extremely bittersweet, much more than ever before. I think maybe it's because we aren't having any more children, so every first that Ava experiences, is a last for us as parents.

Two years old is such a milestone too. She's a fully fledged toddler, with a mind of her own, who no longer wants to be coddled. Well, she does in some circumstances. She still loves skin to skin contact and still sleeps in our bed, but she is extremely independent too! She likes to do things for herself, without the interference of her Mummy and Daddy, even if she struggles. She has such drive and determination, lots of qualities that I hope she holds onto throughout her life because they will get her far.

Don't ever change Ava, you are one in a million and you inspire us to not only be better parents but to be better humans too. We love you more than you'll ever know.

Baby Diary: 5 Months Old

How has it been another month already. Watching you grow before my eyes is so so bittersweet. On one hand I love seeing you learn and grow every single day but on the other I am sad that you are no longer my tiny little baby and are becoming so big! I think this feeling is only something you understand once you become a parent as I never understood it before. 

Character
You are one in a million. You are such a good boy, well for Mummy and Daddy anyway! You really make other people work to gain your trust and you don't really give smiles away for free to people you don't know. You are going through a long phase of suddenly crying when you are in someone else's arms but once you are back with me you instantly stop. It's lovely to know that you just want me but it's also a bit awkward when you are crying your eyes out when someone only wants a cuddle! You are really cheeky and are always smiling. You have this really cute shy side smile that you do when you are feeling coy and it totally melts my heart. You are so giddy and chatty but really know what you want and how to get it too! If we do something you aren't happy with you aren't afraid to tell us.

Size

I'm a bad Mummy cause you haven't been weighed for a while, I'm going to take you down in the next week or so. I guesstimate you are around 18lb? You are still wearing 3-6m but I find the arms can be too long or fit perfectly yet the legs are too short. You have long legs like your parents. Everyone still comments on how big you are but I don't think you are otherwise you would be in bigger close sizes and you aren't yet. You have really bulked up this month though and are getting lovely arm and leg rolls! 

Health

You've had another good month. We took you for your last set of injections and you cried for about 5 seconds and that was it. By the time we got into the car you was smiling and babbling away. You have started teething a lot more this month though but seem to be dealing with it well, for now. You always have your hands in your mouth and you are constantly drooling. 

Feeding

I was making up 7oz bottles last month but we were wasting far too much milk. I now make 6oz bottles and you never drain it. You have around 30oz a day with two meals. Your puree's aren't really replacing any feeds though as you always finish a meal with a bottle! I tend to give you mashed banana or fruit puree for your breakfast with a bottle and then lunch of veg puree. If we don't have lunch we have a porridge supper. It all depends on how you are doing in the day. You have taken to solids like a duck to water and you really enjoy it. You make "om nom nom" noises and get excited when the spoon is coming to your mouth. Your favourite foods are mashed banana, porridge, butternut squash, pear puree and apples. We are going to carry on wish a mix of puree and mash until 6 months and then we are going to introduce finger foods.  

Sleep

You are still a brilliant little sleeper, we are so very lucky. You generally go to bed by 9pm and get up around 9am. Usually without a feed. We had about a week where you were thrashing about at night time and waking up for a feed, which was so unlike you. We took this as the "4 month sleep regression" and just took your lead. Thankfully it looks like it was a short phase as you are back to your usual ways now. Last night you slept for 14 hours! You are still napping great too, little cat naps here and there but they are naps none the less! 

Milestones

- Laughing. You started laughing last month but only when we tickled you but this month you now laugh at us, at what we are doing! You are still making us work for those giggles but when you do laugh its like music to my ears. The loveliest sound in the world. 

- You now know your Name! Which is pretty amazing considering how many nicknames we call you; Noah Noo Noo, Noo, Noo Noo, Noobie!

- Touch. You now grab and touch my face which is insanely cute until your little talons gore a hole into my cheek! Or you decide to grab my nose and try to pull it off! And don't mention my hair! I'm going to have none left you little monkey! 

- Coordination. You are a lot ore coordinated this month. Now when you grab for something you rarely miss. You can guide items into your mouth too. 

- Feet. You have discovered your feet this month. You lay on your back and grab your feet. You haven't figured out that you can put them in your mouth yet though. 

- Jumperoo. This month (in the last few days) you have learnt how to jump in your jumperoo. You have been going in it for a good month now and would just have a wriggle about but over night you seemed to learn how to jump in it and you don't half go full throttle when you are in it. Sometimes I think you are going to fly out! 

- Rolling over. You haven't mastered the roll yet but are slowly getting there. If I put you on your front you can roll from your belly to back (when you can be bothered) If you are on your back you can manage to roll on your side but you haven't achieved a back to front roll yet. We have wood floors so we recently bought you a huge play mat so you can have more space and freedom to explore and grow. 

- Sitting up. You are very strong and steady when it comes to sitting. You can sit with only a little bit of support from us. You are still a bit wobbly but you are getting there. I wouldn't be surprised if you learnt to sit before you learnt to roll over. 

- Standing. You now like to stand and bare your weight on your legs when we hold you. Last month when we did this you would just try and sit down. You have the cheesiest grin on your face when you are standing like you cannot believe what you are doing.

- Movement. You can be sat in our lap or on the play mat and if there is something you want that is out of reach you make attempts at trying to reach for it. When you are sat on my knee and spot something that you want you will lurch forward to try and grab it. I now have to have a firm grip on you at all times! 

- Playing. You have taken an interest in toys for a few months now but this month your fascination with them is growing. Now that you are more coordinated you are able to play a lot better. Even if everything just goes straight into your mouth. 

- Self soothing. You are getting the hang of self soothing, no thanks to me. I would happily sit with you until you fall asleep. Holding your hand, stroking your face, singing to you, rocking you etc. Which is for selfish reasons as I like to do it. But Daddy usually puts you to bed and has been letting you self settle and you have been fab. You sometimes thrash about but you don't make a murmur and if you cried we would be in there with you as we both don't feel comfortable with letting you "cry it out." 

Things you like

- Mummy and Daddy. It's safe to say you have favourites. You have always been a well socialised baby but often cry when with other people. You are at your most happiest, playful and loudest when you are in the company of Mummy and Daddy.

- When Daddy comes home from work. When you hear the front door open at 5:30pm you turn your little head towards the door and wait. When Dad appears and says his hello's you always give him big big smiles and then go all coy like you are shy. It's one of my daily highlights as I am sure it's one of yours and Daddy's too. It warms my heart.

- Food. You cannot get enough food. You are getting fed up of milk and often only drink 3oz to quench your hunger or thirst and then will whine for food. You now have two meals a day and sometimes even three. You favourite foods are porridge, bananas, apples and butternut squash.

- Comforters. I think you are going to be one of those children who carries one everywhere! You need to have one in your arms or one against your face when you are sleeping.

- Remotes/ Mobiles/ Gadgets. I think we have a geek in the making. A gadget geek! I am sure babies aren't supposed to be so interested in these things. You have all these brightly coloured, interactive toys and they could all be lead out in front of you but the moment you spot that boring black remote your eyes light up! You get so excited and will even push your body in it's direction to try to grab it.

- Kisses on your neck. One thing that usually gets me one little giggle is a big wet kiss on your neck! You also find it very funny when I whisper in your ear.

- Yourself. Nothing is more entertaining than watching yourself on video. I have this one video in particular from a few months back that you find hilarious. You flap your arms about and make the funniest of expressions. You also love looking at yourself in the mirror.

- The cats. You have really noticed them this month and when they walk past you will stop whatever you are doing to watch them and then give a big cheesy grin. You like it when I get your hand and stroke them, you get very excited. The cats are also warming to you too but are still a little scared. I wonder what goes through your head when you see them?

- Scout. I recently bought you an interative puppy called Scout who talks, sings, counts and plays music. You adore him. The minute I got him out the box you loved him. During the day we tend to use him for nap times. You self settle a lot now with the help of Scout and his lullaby music.

Things you don't like

- High pitched noises/laughs. A sudden change in anyone's voice seems to scare you and makes you cry your eyes out. 

- Getting dressed. You still hate getting dressed especially when it comes to tshirts! 

- Bibs. You don't mind your face being cleaned with a wet baby wipe but clean your mouth with a bib and we are in the bad books. 

- Not getting fed fast enought. If there isn't another spoonful of food at the ready, you aren't happy!

Noah Nicholas you don't fail to amaze us every single day and you are the best thing that has ever happened to us. We are so proud of you. We love you so so much. 

Baby Diary: 1 Month Old

Noah Nicholas you are one month old already! It feels like only yesterday when you was in my belly, only yesterday that I was in labour but also feels like a lifetime ago. I miss you being in there squirming away but not as much as I love you being here with me. I feel so lucky to be the Mother of someone so perfect and I can't wait to see you grow. You have already changed so much. 

So let's have a lowdown on the month! 

Character
You are such an individual already. I can see you are just like me, a feisty little thing. You seem to know your own mind already and make little grunts when you want or need something. I find you so comical. I can't wait to see your personality to develop!

Size

You have grown so much since you came into the world. You piled on the weight straight away as you love your bottles so much. You never really lost weight and shocked the midwives every time they weighed you! You are filling out a bit more and I am loving your little pot belly!

When you were born you fit into newborn but now you are venturing into 0-3 months. 0-3 varies so much in size, some fit and some are still too big. We had mainly bought 0-3 before you were born as we were expecting a big baby but when you arrived at just 7lb 2oz we had to go out and buy newborn sizes so I am glad you get to wear all the bigger ones now! 

Health
We are very lucky to have a healthy baby in general. You have had a little reflux and do sick up a bit of bottle every now and again but I think that could be due to you drinking too fast sometimes. You also have had a bit of constipation early on in the month, nothing a little boiled water hasn't cured. Trapped wind also likes to make an appearance every now and again. I think that is what you struggle with the most, bless you. You do have very loud and frequent trumps though. Daddy and I have been in bed in fits of laughter at times when you have been beside us in the moses basket trumping like a trooper! 

Feeding
Well well well. You are a little greedy guzzler! Unfortunately breastfeeding didn't work out for us and I don't want to dwell on it because the pressure and stress from failing at it still upsets me. We are formula feeding and currently using first stage Cow and Gate. 

At the beginning of the month you would only take 2oz every two hours. Now you are having 4oz every 2/3 hours and sometimes that isn't enough! If we try to give you more you sick it up so we are going to be trying out hungry baby milk, we are really hoping it agree's with you and you will benefit from it. You sometimes feed for comfort too and love to have the bottle in your mouth when you drift off. I find it funny how much you enjoy your milk as milk was my main craving throughout pregnancy. You even loved it when you was in my womb! 

Sleep

We don't have much of a routine at the moment and what little routine we have isn't the best. You are just like your Dad when he was a baby and awake a lot of the time. You tend to stay awake until 1am in the morning without sleeping much at all throughout the day. You have even been known to stay awake, exhausted and worn out until 4am! You then will sleep through until lunch, waking for feeds and changes. Our clock is back to front! When you are awake you like to have our full attention and get bored very easily. You still don't like sleeping in your moses basket and most nights we co sleep until you are in a deep sleep and I then try to transfer you into it. In the morning's when your Dad has gone to work I bring you in bed with me. This is the area I really want to work on.

Milestones

- Lifting your head. You can lift your head for short periods of time. You have been able to do this for a while now but you haven't got full control though yet. 

- Becoming alert. It's incredible how alert you are. When we talk to you, you look into our eyes and take everything we say in. When someone walks into a room you not only follow them with your eyes but move your head too. It astounds me, you clever little boy. 

- Rolling over. I didn't think you would do this yet but you are able to roll over off your back to onto your front sometimes. You are really strong. 

- Smiling. I know it's wind but your smiles are the cutest. When we speak to you you do smirk though so I don't think it will be long until we have a proper responsive smile and I cannot wait. 

- More vocal. You are making a whole vocabulary of different noises. You make clicking noises with your tongue, grunts, squeaks and have just begun cooing. Even your screams are adorable. 

- Touch. You have begun pulling at my hair, grasping covers and comforters and touch people's faces. Not just a touch but you really have a feel and have even pulled my lip a few times. 

Things you like

- Milk, milk and more milk! You cannot get enough of the white stuff!

- Lights and Shadows. I love watching you gaze in fascination.

- The car, car seat and your pram. You like to be on the move.

- Being held and cuddled. You prefer to be close to us, little love.

- Sleeping in bed with Mummy!

- Snuggles on chests.

- Sitting up like a big boy. We have to hold you and your head of course but you love it and it actually settles you sometimes.

- Shouting! It's sounds like an oi! We always oi you back when you make the sound, it's a funny noise. The oi normally means you want yet more milk! 

Things you don't like

- Being put down. You like a lot of attention!

- Moses baskets. You are not a fan. 

- Getting dressed. You don't mind nappy changes or baths. It's just getting changed that you don't like. 

- Becoming overtired. You like to be awake and alert which leads to you becoming very overtired. 

- Being winded. You fight it so much and push back really strong. 

This whole month has been a total blur of exhausted bliss. My heart melts when I look at you and I still cannot believe I am your Mummy. I can't wait to see you bloom before my eyes. 

Noah Nicholas you are the love of my life.